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The Literary Groong - 05/08/2004

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	OPAQUE

	By Kevork K. Kalayjian, Jr.

	Incoherent voices
	stemming from awareness
	require gratification
	right at this minute when
	the present is not realized.

	The result is this headache
	which you sanitize by naming it
	an `unbalanced state' a hangover
	as if placing stinking garbage
	in a transparent plastic bag.

	You understand of course how different
	it is, watching the fish from
	the transparent side of her prison,
	when you witness the view,
	knowing well that you don't have the right
	to see the animal in that fashion,
	penetrating the intimacy of her routine
	without her permission
	and just for that, she takes your casual glance,
	bewitches it into a gaze, your awareness lost,
	and with mesmerizing motions,
	conquers your consciousness,
	now you are in a most unselfish stage
	you want to give everything generously
	she rejuvenates and recharges her vitality
	feeding on your abandoned awareness,
	as you stare at her dexterity,
	until there is only  .. emptiness in you.

	Only then, by her monotonous moves,
	she bores you, and lets you see reality,
	and you realize the emptiness in you
	as reflected in the fish tank and you are
	ready to withdraw away from the transparent wall
	of the prison made of glass.

	Of course when you watch her directly
	from the water surface, and there are no
	clear and clean walls between you and her,
	or when you look at her in the water
	when you are both swimming,
	it's altogether a different experience.

	Then you may create
	All the walls you want
	Between her and yourself
	Transparent or opaque.


--
Kevork K. Kalayjian, Jr.  A graduate of the AGBU's Melkonian
Educational Institute, Nicosia, Cyprus, holds a B.A. in Political
Science and Economics from Fairleigh Dickinson University, Rutherford,
NJ, and a M. Ed.  Counseling Psychology, from William Paterson
University, Wayne, NJ. Kevork resides in NY with his wife Maral, and
three sons Aramazt, Tro, and Ohanes.

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